129-03-17-2009

We Need to Think Before We Say Hurtful Things!
By W. Owen Thornton

Recently on the CBC Radio One Program “As it Happens,” there was an segment about a man who had lost several millions of dollars in the recent massive multi-billion dollar Ponzi Scheme.  What was appalling was the reaction of normal, middle-class folk: listeners who felt absolutely no sympathy for the man.

Here is the story.  The man, I’ll call him Harry, had never met the individual who had been recently indicted for stealing billions from people, but I am sure that he had it on good authority that the investor could perform wonders: after all the scheme ran 20 years so someone had to have had high returns.  And so, Harry invested everything he had earned with the swindler.  This was money he had earned from selling properties, which I’m assuming he’d purchased and paid off years ago, and he had therefore sold them to realize the income gains.  We didn’t learn much about Harry, which therein is my point.  Certainly Harry was unrepentant in regards to the penalties that the swindler was facing, over 150 years of prison term was in his future.  Harry hoped that the swindler lived a long, long life, because the man had stolen from him and had left him penniless.  At an age that would be inconvenient to go back to work to “re-earn” his lost fortune, he was going to have to go out and start living his work life all over again.  Certainly Harry had suffered a loss that he will never recover from.

I can forgive Harry his righteous anger.  He has a right to be angry at someone swindling him.  What shocked me were the nasty responses from ordinary people around North America.  The talk show host said the responses were typical and if there were contrary responses, the program usually offers both sides.  Seeing as there were no contrary comments sent in either by phone message or email, there seems to have been only one view.  No one had any sympathy for Harry. 

First some noted that Harry had given his money to someone he had never met, they said.  He was foolish.  He deserved what happened to him.  Really?  Giving money to this smooth-talking swindler was something thousands of people and some very legitimate charities did.  It’s no surprise Harry gave him his money!  He didn’t have to meet him to know the results would be terrific!  The swindler came with a 20 year proven track record.  One wouldn’t necessarily have checked the reputation, nor needed to have met with the person investing your millions with the kind of pedigree the swindler would have had at that time!  Hindsight, as they say, is 20-20.  At the time Harry invested his money he didn’t have the luxury the listeners did.  In addition, meeting the swindler would have probably had little impact on Harry’s decision.  The swindler had obviously conned many other decent folk who did meet hm.

Second others offered crocodile tears.  Poor Harry had lost his millions and now he was going to have to go out and work for a living.  Nowhere in the interview did I hear that he had inherited his money, so we have to assume he worked for his millions … and that he worked hard and invested wisely.  Professional athletes make millions a year playing a game and no one thinks ill of them – and they make their money doing nothing of any real importance!  Harry could have really done something to help people while making his money.  We don’t know that he didn’t.  Yes he made mistakes, but we all do and we all need to be there for each other.  That’s human kindness!

Listeners felt no remorse because Harry had had life easy and now he was going to have to go out and ‘really work for a living’ just like they had to go out and earn a living every day – as they had to overcome their life-long losses in the recent stock market crash.  How sad.  Everyone in this life dreams of making it rich, but when they do, what are we saying?  That they don’t deserve their wealth … they don’t know what it is like to work for a living … they didn’t work hard to get it?  Just because we have lost revenue in our lives doesn’t mean we can put Rhino Armor on and laugh at others because they have lost more than us.  Those who derided Harry should be ashamed of themselves.  Rather people should have cheered on Harry while he was making his fortune and … we should have the human kindness inside of us to feel badly for the money he lost. 

So when it comes to someone losing their fortune due to a swindler, regardless of how large that fortune is, we as agents of human kindness should offer everyone our sympathy.  Now I’m sure we all know some scoundrels out there whom we wouldn’t feel sorry for, but I don’t think that includes someone who is wealthy, who makes an honest mistake and who doesn’t check for references! 

The truth is everyone would like to have more money.  Everyone would like to live as the Rich and Famous do, but the sad part of it is not all of us can.  Some of us work hard all our lives and only eke out a living.  Some others do the same kinds of things and strike it rich.  The world has been full of these stories and it doesn’t appear as though it will change.  I always thought, however, it was the lives of the rich and famous … if we don’t become too jealous of them that we become mean, bitter, and dispirited people … who give the rest of us hope that we too, one day, might become rich and famous ourselves.  They are the ones that inspire us to keep trying to strike it rich: not make us jaded that we’ll never get there (and then we can laugh at them when they lose it all!).

And I’ve also seen just ordinary folk be taken for all they have because they too believed in things that were too good to be true and we see that as tragic.  We are all susceptible to greed and corruption … just a little bit anyways.  So why can’t we have any sympathy for Harry?  I for one, when I was listening thought what had happened to him was very tragic.  I never once thought he “got his just desserts”, nor did I “cry crocodile tears”.  It is tragic whenever anyone is swindled by someone who acts and appears trustworthy.

Look.  I for one have made stupid misjudgments about people where the situation was clear that I was wrong.  Maybe Harry was a jerk.  Maybe he was a spoiled rich guy who deserved what he got.  Maybe he was a fool parted with his money in a get-rich-quick scheme.  I’m just saying in this case that there was no evidence of any of those things and to think them before any real evidence is in runs counter to human kindness.  We have got to start giving people the benefit of the doubt rather than condemning them first.  I don’t want to live in a world where we shoot and ask questions later.  I want to live in one where we can share human kindness with one another.  Where I can find a shoulder to cry on when the chips are down.  I think that’s the kind of world you want to live in too. 

So think about it.  Who should you call and say, “Sorry to hear about your misfortune?”  That just may be a call you might like to hear some day. 

God Bless

Owen